If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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