We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize