my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
I want to fling myself into the sun
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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