I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
