I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
i think i have herpe
just one?
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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