we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
