im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
