Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I said "one day" and that day is not today
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
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