Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
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