I accidentally had phone sex last night
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found puke in my bra..
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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