left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Randomize
