the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
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