there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
