Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
