How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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