Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
