you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
