she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Randomize
