she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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