margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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