just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want nice things and good sex
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize