false alarm. still invincible.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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