where does the pee come out of this thing
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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