He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
