so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
