I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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