First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
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