Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
there's paper in my vomit.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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