3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
