in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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