Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Randomize
