a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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