Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
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