So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
