But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize