I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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