I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I look better un-naked...
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Randomize
