Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
the day after is always just damage control
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize