i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
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