Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
this hospital has no fireball
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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