You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
then he tried to convert me to islam
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize
