I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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