oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
