My friends, they love my intelligence
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
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