Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
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