nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize
