it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
