oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
