How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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