READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
Randomize
